Scappoose

Every time I meet someone from Scappoose, I mention that my sister lives there. Without fail, they immediately ask me her name, as if Scappoose is such a small town where everyone knows each other. Perhaps that was true 15 years ago, but if the afternoon traffic on highway 30 is any indication, Scappoose is rapidly becoming another of Portland's bedroom communities. When I met Mayor Scott Burge, he of course asked me who my sister was. And just like everyone else I've ever met from Scappoose, he's never heard of her.
Mayor Burge and I talked about the Scappoose Creek Inn, which is where I took the above picture of a really tiny llama that had gotten snared in a spider web. He told me that since the Inn isn't within the city limits of Scappoose, his city doesn't get any tax benefits. "We have a hotel tax," he joked, "But no hotels." Such is the life of a small town mayor. Being the awesome husband that I am, I took my family up to Scappoose for my wife's birthday last year. A lot of people might find that odd, I suppose, but a lot of people are stupid. I honestly believe that there is just as much value in eating weird Hawaiian food and watching your toddler chase chickens around as there is in, say, going back to Seaside again. Come on people, how many times do you need to go to Seaside before it gets old?

You can also head up the hill to Scaponia Park and find huckleberries and caterpillars. We found about 3 pints worth and made milkshakes when we got home (with the huckleberries, not the caterpillars). Or you can rent some kayaks and see about a hundred beavers and heron in the various sloughs and lakes. You can have what is possibly the worst Chinese food ever, if you're into that sort of thing. Better yet, you can eat here. It's like a cross between a nice restaurant and a dive bar. I'm trying to convey a sense of urgency when it comes to Scappoose, because I'm afraid that in the next ten years it will be swallowed up by Portland kind of like Wilsonville was in the early 90s. I guess what I'm saying is that you should go before they have a Best Buy.
Nine down, 233 to go.